How to Make Financial Choices During Life Changes You Never Planned For

Key Takeaways

  • You’re not making financial decisions in a vacuum, you’re making them while overwhelmed, scared, and stressed, which is exactly why support matters.

  • Divorce, loss, or major life change has financial implications you may not see, but experts do, and the right guidance protects your future.

  • Women especially carry the weight of financial literacy gaps, but those gaps close quickly with support.

  • “Can I keep the house?” is the #1 question, and the answer depends on mortgages, budgets, legal support, and long-term projections, not fear.

  • You do not have to navigate property division, support, or buying/selling alone. Your team of professionals will catch what you can’t see.

Finance & Real Estate Through Life Changes: What You Don’t Know Will Hurt You — Unless You Ask

Let’s be honest:
When life falls apart, through divorce, loss, a career shift, or unexpected upheaval, your finances can feel like the last thing you’re equipped to face.

And yet… every major decision depends on them.

  • Your home.

  • Your kids’ stability.

  • Your future income.

  • Your retirement.

  • Your ability to breathe again without panic.

The good news?
You’re not supposed to figure this out alone.

Our Finance & Real Estate Panel brought together four heart-centered professionals: mortgage, financial planning, divorce coaching, and real estate, each of whom got into this work because they lived these life changes personally.

Here’s what they want you to know.

1. You’re Not Failing — You’re Overwhelmed. And That Changes Everything.

Most people reach out long after they “should have,” because:

  • they feel embarrassed

  • they don’t want to look “stupid”

  • they assume they should already know how money works

  • they’re too overwhelmed by surviving day-to-day

If this sounds familiar, you’re in good company.

You’re not behind. You’re unsupported.
And support is exactly what this community exists to give.

2. Women Are Still Told They “Don’t Need to Worry About the Finances” — Until They Have To

Mortgage broker Nicki Laberge sees it every day.

Even when women run the household mentally, emotionally, and practically… many haven’t been included in financial decisions.

Not because they’re incapable.
But because they weren’t invited into those conversations.

And then suddenly they’re supposed to:

  • negotiate assets

  • understand mortgages

  • qualify for financing

  • make decisions with lifelong impact

  • protect their kids

  • and stay calm doing it

No wonder so many feel stuck, scared, or “not ready.”

But here’s the shift:

Financial literacy isn’t about intelligence.
It’s about exposure.
And exposure is fixable.

This panel exists to close that gap.

3. The #1 Question: “Can I Keep the House?”

Everyone asks it.
Every single time.

And the answer is rarely simple.

There are three layers to this decision:

A. Emotional readiness

Stability for the kids often feels non-negotiable. Keeping the home can reduce the chaos they’re already living in.

B. Financial reality

Even if you can qualify for the mortgage…
Should you?

A house might be:

  • too expensive long-term

  • manageable short-term

  • doable if support is structured differently

  • or not feasible today but feasible later

Only a professional looking at the full picture can tell you.

C. Long-term impact

This is where financial planner Doug Pinder steps in:

  • What happens 1 year from now?

  • 5 years?

  • When support ends?

  • When kids age out?

  • If interest rates rise?

  • If you take property instead of RRSPs?

  • If you choose cash instead of equity?

One decision affects every future one.

And you deserve to see the whole picture before you sign anything.

4. Not All Support Is Equal — And the Wrong Guidance Can Cost You Years

Divorce coach & CPA Jodie Graham sees the same pattern:

People assume:

  • 50/50 custody = no child support

  • “We agreed on no spousal support” means it’s binding

  • informal arrangements are fine

  • mediation is always the right path

  • they’ll “work it out” without legal advice

But that’s not how the law works.

Child support is for the child, not the parents, and isn’t negotiable.

Spousal support has guidelines.

Separation agreements matter.

And without formal documentation, you may lose:

  • support

  • mortgage options

  • access to financing

  • the ability to buy again

  • years of stability

Informal arrangements feel easier, until they blow up later.

5. Hidden Assets and Financial Abuse: When “Something Feels Off,” It Usually Is

Some financial problems are honest mistakes.
Some are not.

Experts look for things you might miss:

  • unexplained withdrawals

  • transfers to unknown accounts

  • “missing” investment balances

  • sudden drop in declared income

  • cash transactions that don’t add up

  • bank statements that don’t match the story

You’re not supposed to catch what a trained financial professional can.

And yes, financial abuse is real, common, and often invisible to the person experiencing it.

If you feel controlled, restricted, confused, or “kept out” of the finances… ask for help. Quietly if needed.

6. Real Estate Decisions Are About More Than Housing — They’re About Safety, Stability & Sanity

Realtor Chris Matlashewski summed it up beautifully:

“Before you decide where to live, decide what will take the weight off your shoulders."

Checklist before buying or renting:

✔ What are your essentials?
✔ Where will your kids feel most stable?
✔ What school/community will help them adjust?
✔ What can you realistically afford?
✔ What do utilities, taxes, insurance, and repairs cost?
✔ Do you need a short-term rental while the dust settles?
✔ What’s the local market doing?
✔ Should you sell now—or wait six months?
✔ Can you negotiate support or education funding to bridge the gap?

This isn’t just real estate.
It’s rebuilding a life.

7. You Don’t Need to Rush. Sometimes the Best Decision Is a Temporary One.

A strategy that works beautifully:

  • stay in the home temporarily

  • stabilize yourself and your kids

  • plan your next move intentionally

  • make decisions once the emotional fog lifts

This can buy time to:

  • increase your income

  • complete training or education

  • negotiate support

  • build credit

  • prepare for a move that feels good, not desperate

Many families benefit from a short-term bridge solution before making big, irreversible decisions.

8. Your Future Is Shaped by the Questions You Ask Today

If you take nothing else from this panel, take this:

There are always more options than you think.
You just need the right people to show them to you.

You deserve a calm, informed, supported path forward, one where you understand:

  • your finances

  • your rights

  • your options

  • and your long-term stability

And you deserve a team that cares enough to walk with you through every step.

This panel exists for exactly that purpose.

You are not alone.
You are not failing.
You are not stuck.

You’re simply in the middle of a life change, and you have an entire community ready to help you through.

We have a team of heart-centered experts to guide & support you.
They look forward to meeting you :)

(* You can watch the full replay HERE)


Note: The author, compiler and publisher do not assume and hereby disclaim any liability to any party due to these words coming from the author’s own opinion based on their experiences. This account is based on the author’s own personal experience. We assume no responsibility for errors or omissions in these articles.


Next
Next

Lead How You Want to Be Led: The Golden Rule for Leaders